Wise Funny Quotes

Wise Funny Quotes

Read and enjoy Wise Funny Quotes

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Be yourself ; everyone else is already taken - Oscar Wilde
Be yourself ; everyone else is already taken – Oscar Wilde
Yesterday i was clever , so i wanted to change the world . Today i am wise , so i am changing my self
Yesterday i was clever , so i wanted to change the world . Today i am wise , so i am changing my self
The only time a woman is helpless is when het nail polish is drying . Other than that , watch out
The only time a woman is helpless is when het nail polish is drying . Other than that , watch out
Don't ruin a new day by thinking about yesterday . Let it go
Don’t ruin a new day by thinking about yesterday . Let it go
We don't see things as they are . We see things as we are
We don’t see things as they are . We see things as we are
Any man who can drive safely while kissing a pretty girl is simply not giving the kiss the attention it deserves
Any man who can drive safely while kissing a pretty girl is simply not giving the kiss the attention it deserves
" Do what you have to do until you can do what you want to do " - Oprah Winfrey
” Do what you have to do until you can do what you want to do ” – Oprah Winfrey
I hate waiting . But if waiting means being able to be with you . I'll wait for as long as forever to be with
I hate waiting . But if waiting means being able to be with you . I’ll wait for as long as forever to be with
My wallet is like an onion . WHen i open it . I start to cry
My wallet is like an onion . WHen i open it . I start to cry
" A day without sunshine is like you know right " - Steve Martin
” A day without sunshine is like you know right ” – Steve Martin
What you mean if i lost weight id be cute ? Bitch i been cute !!
What you mean if i lost weight id be cute ? Bitch i been cute !!
My play was a complete success . The audience was a failure
My play was a complete success . The audience was a failure
I'm not getting old . I'm getting better
I’m not getting old . I’m getting better
" Today me will live in the moment unless it's unpleasant in which case me will eat a cookie " - Cookie Monster
” Today me will live in the moment unless it’s unpleasant in which case me will eat a cookie ” – Cookie Monster
Hold the vision , Trust the process - Wise Funny Quotes
Hold the vision , Trust the process – Wise Funny Quotes
A wise woman once said " FUCK THIS SHIT " and she lived happily ever after
A wise woman once said ” FUCK THIS SHIT ” and she lived happily ever after
" Spit on me again , and I'm gonna rip your fucking cunt off " - Trant Reznor
” Spit on me again , and I’m gonna rip your fucking cunt off ” – Trant Reznor
At the end of the day you can either focus on wahts tearing you apart or whats holding you together
At the end of the day you can either focus on wahts tearing you apart or whats holding you together
We all are a little broken & that's okay
We all are a little broken & that’s okay
Brother and sister , together as friends , ready to face whatever life sends " - Robert Brault
Brother and sister , together as friends , ready to face whatever life sends ” – Robert Brault
" The main reason santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live " - George Carlin
” The main reason santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live ” – George Carlin
" YOu can't wake a person who is pretending to be asleep " - Navajo Proverb
” YOu can’t wake a person who is pretending to be asleep ” – Navajo Proverb
Stop being afraid of what could go wrong and start being positive about what could go right
Stop being afraid of what could go wrong and start being positive about what could go right
I'm no cactus expert but i know a prick when i see one
I’m no cactus expert but i know a prick when i see one
Keep calm and let karma finish it
Keep calm and let karma finish it
Running away from your problems is a race . You're never win
Running away from your problems is a race . You’re never win
This quote changed my life . " If it won't matter in 5 years , don't spend more than 5 minutes getting angry about it "
This quote changed my life . ” If it won’t matter in 5 years , don’t spend more than 5 minutes getting angry about it “
" YOu can't wake a person who is pretending to be asleep " - Navajo Proverb
” YOu can’t wake a person who is pretending to be asleep ” – Navajo Proverb
" The robbed that smiles steals something from the thief " - William Shakespeare
” The robbed that smiles steals something from the thief ” – William Shakespeare
The Best Funny Stories Jokes And Quotes
Funny World Online. The Best Funny Stories Jokes And Quotes, Funny Videos... A collection of the funniest stories and jokes, videos, quotes, poetries, news...Hope you have fun :)

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