Funny short stories for adults part 4
“Hello?” Hearing only heavy breathing on the line, the woman repeated, “Hello?” “I’ll bet you want me to come into your bedroom,” a male voice whispered huskily, “…undress you, lick you from head to toe and make love to you until morning.” “Geez,” the woman replied, “you can tell all that from two hello’s?”
Engineer Had Just Returned from a Week Long Seminar…
The Engineer had just returned from a week long seminar. His boss, instead of asking about the details, asked if were sick as he looked absolutely terrible. “Well…” said the Engineer, “I met this blonde and turned out she was an engineer-in-training and wanted me to tutor her. One thing lead to another and we ended up back in her room having wild gorilla sex all night.” “OK,” replied the boss, “that may explain your fatigue, but why are your eyes so red ?” “Well…” said the Engineer, “turns out she was married and had a baby at home. She started crying, and I started thinking about my own wife and kids, so I cried too.” “I see.” chided the boss, “but that seminar ended Friday. How come you still appear so ragged ?” “Well…” said the Engineer, “you can’t sit there and cry 4-5 times a day for four days and not look like this.”
After the first week of sex education class, a young shapely teen stormed out of the room after the class was over. Encountering a female friend in the hall, the friend asked, “Lori, what in the world is the matter with you? You look as if you’re about to kill someone.” “I am !!!” Lori fumed. “You just wait until I catch up with that Dennis. All summer long, that clown had me convinced that ‘foreplay’ involved tossing a coin for position.”
A guy is screwing a great looking blonde. The girl asks, “You haven’t got AIDS, have you?” He replies, “No.” She responds, “Oh, thank heavens for that! I don’t want to get that again…!”
When Is It OK for a Lady to Slap a Midget?
When is it OK for a lady to slap a midget? When they are slow dancing and he tells her how nice her hair smells.