Funniest Quotes In The World

Funniest Quotes In The World

Read and enjoy Funniest Quotes In The World 

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I would never die for my beliefs because i might be wrong
I would never die for my beliefs because i might be wrong
THAT AWKWARD MOMENT . when granny has more upper - body strength than you
THAT AWKWARD MOMENT . when granny has more upper – body strength than you
A dog is the only thing on earth that loves you more than you love yourself
A dog is the only thing on earth that loves you more than you love yourself
Everyone appreciates your honesty , until you're honset with them , then you'tr an asshole
Everyone appreciates your honesty , until you’re honset with them , then you’tr an asshole
Fresh new haircut gets called a girl
Fresh new haircut gets called a girl
From the moment we started talking i knew that i wanted you around
From the moment we started talking i knew that i wanted you around
If you could choose between world peace and bill gate's money ... what color would your lamborgini be ?
If you could choose between world peace and bill gate’s money … what color would your lamborgini be ?
" Excuse me , i understand that you like taking naps . But i don't " - Henry , age 3
” Excuse me , i understand that you like taking naps . But i don’t ” – Henry , age 3
I did not slap you . I high fived your face
I did not slap you . I high fived your face
The end is NEAR ! Are you referring to the apocalypse , the debt ceiling or newt gingrich's presidential run ?
The end is NEAR ! Are you referring to the apocalypse , the debt ceiling or newt gingrich’s presidential run ?
A lie gets halfway around the world before the truth has a chance to get its pants on
A lie gets halfway around the world before the truth has a chance to get its pants on
Everything i learned in college can now be found for free on the internet
Everything i learned in college can now be found for free on the internet
I want a mouse . I want a fish . I want milk . I want to change the world
I want a mouse . I want a fish . I want milk . I want to change the world
HOME ALONE . Someone knocks at the door
HOME ALONE . Someone knocks at the door
Help ! I'm hanging on by a thread . Oh my god . Could you give me a hand ? Of course ! Whoo , Well Done ! Great job ! Wait , nevermind , i take that back
Help ! I’m hanging on by a thread . Oh my god . Could you give me a hand ? Of course ! Whoo , Well Done ! Great job ! Wait , nevermind , i take that back
Grandparents be like . One little snack before you go home
Grandparents be like . One little snack before you go home
" As long as there is profit in war , the world will never know peace "
” As long as there is profit in war , the world will never know peace “
The less you give a fuck , the happier you'll be
The less you give a fuck , the happier you’ll be
Went ti Costco . No free samples today
Went ti Costco . No free samples today
I don't always listen to rap in the car
I don’t always listen to rap in the car
Red bull gives you wings . VODKA gives you 4x4
Red bull gives you wings . VODKA gives you 4×4
The trouble with being in the rat race is that even that even if you win , you're still a rat
The trouble with being in the rat race is that even that even if you win , you’re still a rat
When life knocks you down , roll over and look at the stars
When life knocks you down , roll over and look at the stars
" Monkeys are good at trusting their muscles and being knowing no matter what move they will catch the next branch
” Monkeys are good at trusting their muscles and being knowing no matter what move they will catch the next branch
I don't always fart in public . But when i do , i lean like this
I don’t always fart in public . But when i do , i lean like this
" Don't worry about the world coming to an end today . It is already tomorrow in Australia " - Char;es Schulz
” Don’t worry about the world coming to an end today . It is already tomorrow in Australia ” – Char;es Schulz
If your boyfriend doesn't like fishing and hunting ... you have a girlfriend!
If your boyfriend doesn’t like fishing and hunting … you have a girlfriend!
Owner said meow . He understands my language
Owner said meow . He understands my language
" I think celine show will entertain anyone ! Black to russians from skinny tight jean denim leggin wearing guys to old people with no teeth"
” I think celine show will entertain anyone ! Black to russians from skinny tight jean denim leggin wearing guys to old people with no teeth”
" Share your smile with the world . It's a symbol of friendship and peace " - Christie Brinkley
” Share your smile with the world . It’s a symbol of friendship and peace ” – Christie Brinkley

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The Best Funny Stories Jokes And Quotes
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